Chinese Traditions

Since being in China I have met many Chinese people preparing to embark upon a trip or period of study in the UK asking me worriedly about the culture and traditions of England. Fearful questions about whether speaking during dinner will earn them immediate ostracism or using their fork with their right hand will cause irreparable loss of reputation have been met by myself with baffled bemusement. I have many times assured people that in fact, yes, whilst traditional etiquette dictates the fork be used in the left hand, it is unlikely to be something that anyone would comment on or be bothered about. The reasons not to be too afraid are twofold, one: even if a tradition exists, most people are not especially fussed about it and two: even if you were to do something slightly against etiquette (asking someone about their salary on a first meeting for example), most people would put it down to you not being familiar with the culture and move on.

For people who are concerned about traditions and ethics in China, it is very much the same situation. Whilst there are certain ways of acting and a set of manners, most people do not get too hot under the collar about it, and failure to conform is usually forgiven on account of being in a foreign environment and perhaps unaware of the customs. Most schools for example will play the national anthem in the morning as the students are arriving. At my first school, from the first note to the last all the students and teachers would stop in their tracks and remain still until the end of the anthem. Personally I was never sure if I was expected to also remain motionless, or if it not being my anthem made me exempt from this. To be on the safe side I joined in, however on occasion if I was in a rush I continued walking – neither receiving disapproving stares nor an immediate lynching I thought it safe to categorise that as a custom that I needn’t adhere to rigidly.

A number of other traditions appear frequently in guides for China, however I think most fall within the aforementioned category. It is considered unlucky for example to place chopsticks vertically (in a bowl of rice for example) as it resembles the sticks placed in graves. When drinking alcohol, rather than drinking freely people will usually clink glasses with someone prior to every sip (for further etiquette regarding the clinking it is a mark of respect to place your glass lower than that of the host when you raise glasses). At some point or another I have broken all of these customs (either through forgetfulness or ignorance) and never been the recipient of criticism or judgement. On occasion people might correct your transgression, but this tends to be in a kindly manner as they do not necessarily expect foreigners to be aware of Chinese customs. In fact it can sometimes seem that Chinese people disagree on what is ‘Chinese culture’ and what isn’t. I have been told before when enquiring about the cost of having Chinese lessons that “Chinese people do not like to talk about money” yet the regularity with which taxi drivers ask me my monthly salary seems to contradict this assertion.

Every country has a number of customs, traditions and systems of etiquette. Yet my advice to any foreigners coming out to China would be not to worry about it – you won’t have your visa revoked for saying the wrong thing at dinner.